IN ANTICIPATION OF THE COMING dOOMSDAY, I HAVE PLACED TEN SECRET, HIDDEN "DOOMSDAY EMERGENCY" BUTTONS THROUGHOUT THIS SITE. SHOULD YOU FIND ONE OF THESE BUTTONS, YOU WILL WIN AN EXCLUSIVE DOOMSDAY SHELTER "DOOMSDAY RATIONS AND SUPPLIES" PACK.

IF YOU LIVE WITHIN THE DOOMSDAY BLAST RADIUS, I WILL PERSONALLY DELIVER YOUR WINNINGS TO YOUR DOOR AND PERFORM A SHORT STANDUP SET FOR YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS: IN YOUR YARD, ON YOUR PORCH, IN YOUR DUNGEON BASEMENT, ETC.

SHOULD YOU WIN AND LIVE OUTSIDE OF THE BLAST RADIUS, WE WILL COME UP WITH AN ALTERNATIVE DELIVERY ADVENTURE.

THANK YOU FOR JOINING US IN THE DOOMSDAY SHELTER. NOW GET OUT THERE, EXPLORE THE SITE, AND FIND THOSE BUTTONS!

JASON FYLAN-MARES